


Alone, again.

by Distoredxreality



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Angst, Hurt, Introspection, Loneliness, One Shot Collection, Post-Season/Series 04, Pre-Canon, Reflection, character study kinda
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-15
Updated: 2020-08-15
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:48:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25922353
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Distoredxreality/pseuds/Distoredxreality
Summary: Loneliness: an unpleasant emotional response to perceived isolation.Exploring how the characters experience feeling lonely before, during and after Lucifer.
Comments: 3
Kudos: 9





	Alone, again.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! This is the first time I’ve written for like a really long time so I may be a little rusty. This is mostly sad but if you squint you’ll find some happy. Just a small idea that came into my mind at 2am, enjoy and any constructive criticism is encouraged :)
> 
> The first chapter is a little different to the rest as it only explores one experience whereas following chapters will explore multiple times.

Chapter 1: Dan

“So Layla, do you enjoy work?”

Truthfully Dan wasn’t paying much attention to the woman sitting in front of him, too distracted by the candle on the table behind her to the left. He watched it flicker as the couple sitting on opposite sides of the table leant in to give each other a kiss. They look happy, genuinely and effortlessly happy. He sighed and returned his attention to his date, focusing on her eyes as they lit up while she spoke about her job, a prison guard. Maybe he had a type, her honey blonde hair and blue eyes could prove that. Or her strong aura which gave off powerful, independent vibes. It didn’t take a detective to see Dan’s attraction to women that could put him in his place.

But none could do it like she did.

No matter who his date is, how pretty her eyes are or how much she loves her job, none of them ever compare to her. To Charlotte. To his Charlotte.

But he’s polite, or just showcasing his previous behaviour of deflecting with little white lies, both are true. So he nods enthusiastically, prompting her to go on as he tries to listen more. And when he goes to pay for the bill she insists they go halves, there it is again that reminder that he has a type.

But it’s not her, they’re never her.

She tells him that they should see each other again and almost like clockwork he goes in for a kiss, like he does with every date. Layla’s lips taste like red wine and satin lipstick. It feels wrong, and he yearns for the taste of her coffee stained lips with a hint of her matte burgundy lipstick.

Lawyer colour.

Breaking off the kiss he hums in noncommittal agreement, excuses himself and all but runs off. He’s outside but it feels like there’s no air and the warm LA night isn’t helping. Why can’t he breathe? When he finally gets to his car he lets his forehead hit against the wheel with a grunt. It’s been five years, countless dates and numerous therapy sessions and yet he still can’t look at another woman and not think of her.

After taking a few minutes to collect himself and regain his composure in the safety of silence he sighed and began to drive, almost on autopilot until he got back home. Could he call it a home? More like a lousy bachelor pad.

After chucking his keys on the counter, he fished his phone out of his pocket. 1 New message from Chloe. It was a photo of a science project Trixie had been doing for school, with a small smile he sighed. His little girl was growing up so fast and this was another reminder of everything he had lost. He’d wasted so much time putting work before his daughter and Chloe, it didn’t seem bad at the time but he spent so much of it pushing her away.

2 chances, he’d had two chances with two amazing women and both times he let time and opportunity pass him by. A wash of anger ran through him, if Lucifer hadn’t come along none of this would have happened. He came in like a wrecking ball into their lives and now where was he? Gone.

Counting to five Dan steadied his breath and counted to ten like Linda had been teaching him too. As the anger rinsed off he shook the thoughts away, deep down he knew this wasn’t Lucifer’s fault. Even though he was angry at him for disappearing, once again, leaving Chloe heartbroke. It wasn’t Lucifer’s fault for his previous mistakes. He hadn’t treated Chloe the way she deserved for a long time before Lucifer came, he hadn’t spent enough time with his family before someone else had the chance to. And it wasn’t Lucifer’s fault he’d wasted too much time without Charlotte.

But Pierce, that was a different story. Dan still hoped that he was rotting in hell for what he had done, because after all it was him who took her life away too early.

He sat down on the couch with a humph and once again felt numb, because without all the anger all he really had was regrets. If he’d realised sooner, if he’d prioritised his family sooner, if he had told her how he felt sooner. Not many people got a second chance like he had, yet he still lost her.

But hindsight is a wonderful thing.

He awakes a few hours later, groggy eyed he sees it’s still dark outside and goes to check his phone. Nothing.


End file.
